


Not Yet

by historyofamanda



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-06
Updated: 2016-09-06
Packaged: 2018-08-13 09:19:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 843
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7971511
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/historyofamanda/pseuds/historyofamanda
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Shepard visits a firing range for the first time since the Reapers were defeated, and the outcome is not what she expects.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not Yet

**Author's Note:**

> This fic was written for a Mass Effect Fanfiction Writers Drabble Challenge :) The prompt was "first mistakes."

Garrus and Shepard stood at the firing range inside the Citadel. It had been reserved just for them for as long as they needed. Saving the galaxy did come with a few perks after all. 

A few of Shepard's ribs had been broken after the explosion on the Citadel and she had spent several weeks recovering at Huerta Memorial after she was rescued by the Normandy the night the Reapers were defeated. Shepard was not used to being inactive for so long and by the time she was released from the hospital she was _very_ antsy. 

Shepard slowly stood up out of her wheelchair, and Garrus took her hand as she walked over to her station.

"Are you sure you're ready for this, Shepard? I know the docs said you were mostly healed but you've still got a little ways to go, they haven’t taken off your bandages yet." Garrus said, concern in his eyes.

"Thank you Garrus, but I'm okay. It's important to me that I do this. I've hated being bed ridden for so long and I need to do something I'm comfortable with, to prove to myself I can still do it."

Garrus nodded and put his hand on her cheek, causing a soft smile to spread on her face.

Garrus handed Shepard her M-15 Vindicator assault rifle, her trusty companion that she had used more than any other gun over the years. When he placed it in her hands she smiled and gently hugged it to her chest.

Shepard laughed quietly. "Never thought I'd be this glad to see a gun again. It sort of feels like reuniting with an old friend."

She took a deep breath. "Okay. Here we go." 

She moved her target back a hundred yards or so and set it to be perfectly still. She knew this was a shot she had never missed on the battlefield in her entire career and this would be the easiest practice shot she could possibly make for herself.

She aligned her eye up with the scope and as she was about to shoot, every memory of the last month of her life came flooding back. The countless deaths that surrounded her on the streets of London as she fought to reach the Citadel, the screams of the soldiers, the fear in her friends eyes as they walked away from her one last time, when Garrus was injured and he told her he loved her as they were pulled apart from each other, the sharp pain and dirt in her lungs as they pulled her from the wreckage....

The M-15 let out a loud bang. She looked up at her target and did not see a single scratch on it. She had missed.

Shepard's eyes began to well up with tears and she put her head down. 

"I...missed, Garrus. I missed. I never miss." She said, heartbreak clear in her voice.

"Shepard..." Garrus began.

"No, Garrus, no. I don't make mistakes! I didn't save the entire god damn galaxy by making mistakes!" Tears began to pour out of her eyes as her sobs became louder.

Garrus took the gun from Shepard and placed it aside. He then wrapped her up gently in his arms and let her cry into his chest.

"Shepard, you just went through the most difficult few years of any human being to ever live. You saved the entire galaxy and made it out with a few broken ribs. You saved countless lives and got rid of the greatest force to ever threaten our galaxy. You've never once given yourself a break and now you need one more than ever. No one expects you to be back to 100% so fast, these things are going to take time. What you've been through is...unimaginable. If I didn't know you personally I wouldn't believe half the shit that's happened to you."

Between her tears Shepard let out a sad, soft laugh. The crying was making her ribs ache and she was attempting to quiet herself. She looked up into Garrus' eyes and softly kissed his cheek.

"I'm not ready Garrus. I thought I was ready to get back and do this, but I'm not. I thought I was okay, but I'm really not." Shepard said, her voice hoarse and quiet.

"I understand.” Garrus said. “Anything you need, you know you have a huge number of people to help you through this. Me, Liara, Tali, Kaidan, Wrex, everyone. We're all here for you. You've done enough for everyone else, let everyone else help you for a change. You don't have to fight this battle alone."

Shepard looked down at the floor, trying to stifle her tears. Garrus put his hand on her cheek and kissed her forehead.

"I love you and we're gonna get through this together, no matter what it takes." He said, taking her hands in his. He kissed the top of her hands and a few final tears rolled down Shepard's face, Garrus wiping them away quickly.

"I love you too, Garrus. Thank you."


End file.
